How I Used My Diabetes to Become a Better Person

I now count it as a blessing

The doctor had the test report in front of him showing my sugar readings. They were way off the charts. An uncomfortable silence hung over the entire room. The doctor pronounced his verdict. He told me that I was diabetic. That too at the ripe old age of 25 years.
“But,” I said anxiously “doesn’t it happen to older people?”

The doctor shook his head and said gravely “It can happen at any time.”
Suddenly the room felt dark and cold. I was only half-listening, as he tried to explain to me how my body had stopped producing insulin because a gene had got triggered and the insulin-producing cells were being destroyed. He also told me that it might have possibly got triggered due to my obesity.

I looked down at my pear-shaped body. “Obese” sounded a much nicer word to describe it than fat, but it was true. I had trouble bending over and tying my shoelaces. My mother’s fears had been proven right. I had been showing all symptoms of diabetes- losing weight rapidly and also being thirsty and hungry all the time. My mom had been after me to see a doctor. I had reluctantly agreed to her pleading, saying there was nothing wrong with me and the doctor’s visit would prove it.

Oh, how horribly wrong I was! Sitting there, my future seemed bleak. The doctor told me I would have to live with the disease for the rest of my life. How could I live with this my entire life when I had not even started it yet?
I felt ashamed that I had a disease which, in my view happened only to retired folks.

The next 10 years I went through all the classic stages of grief. The first two years, I denied its existence. Then I spent some time feeling guilty for not doing anything, then anger and finally depression. It was already ten years since I had been living with diabetes. Things had only worsened. I had to be operated upon in my back and leg twice due to infections.

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